Mindfulness Is A Virtue
You may not realize this, but sometimes in relationships both partners can start to operate on Autopilot. Remember this: each person and situation is unique, and past reactions or habits don’t always mesh well with the present moment. This is the very reason why it’s so important to cultivate mindfulness in your relationship.
Think about it, the more you stay in the moment whether its good or bad, the more you’ll be able to make the most of the relationship.
Mindfulness in relationships is one of those things that are easier said than done. Be careful on becoming too comfortable with your habits, you might not even notice yourself sinking into a deep hole in the ground.
Here are 3 thoughts for examination while you’re in a relationship:
IS IT TRUE?
This is the first question you should be asking yourself, this question should have been asked even before you committed to said relationship. Is the thought you’re having 100% absolutely true? It might really feel like your partner doesn’t like your family, but do you know that’s absolutely true? When you question the validity of a thought, you might find that it’s not actually true. For instance, in this example, you might ask your partner, ‘Was something bothering you at dinner tonight?’ instead of your initial reaction, which might have been, ‘Why do you hate my family?’Remember, you will never really know what is going on in someone else’s thoughts, those mood swings might not even have anything related to you.
IS IT ADDING SOMETHING?
Those extra thoughts of doubt might be adding an increase to your stress level, which might be negatively impacting how you interact with your partner. You can’t necessarily change how you feel but you can change how you think about the situation. Always find something of value in everything you do with your partner, this will encourage them to try harder and will help your communication. Don’t think too much of it, you might be making the situation worse by continuing to think bad thoughts.
IS IT POSITIVE?
Now, if you’ve determined that a thought is both true and adding something, it is time to question whether or not that thought is positive. Say you both have completely opposite views on a matter like.. political views. Instead of just completely avoiding the topic, how about you dish out some things you both LIKE about a certain topic? Look at the commonness and not the differences. You can change negatives into a positive.
Mindfulness doesn’t change how things are, but it does change how you see them, which can have a huge impact on how you live in the current moment and can even prevent tragedies from happening.